But she had no idea that I too, had experienced and was right in the middle of my own relationship chaos, and those struggles were the core reason that I was standing in front of her. I honestly can’t remember exactly how I answered her question, but if that same question were asked to me today, my answer would be this, “I first had to discover the excellence that was lying dormant within me, and once I did, I began to make some difficult decisions that were for my spiritual, mental, and emotional health and stability.” I continued searching for books on this topic. Although the books I found were informative, I did not find exactly what I needed. I eventually realized that if I wanted the perfect book, I had to write it myself. While listening to conversations weekly, I realized that although the women shared their negative experiences, the responsibility to initiate change ultimately remained with the individual. Many have experienced unhealthy dating patterns. Overcoming these negative patterns can be challenging, but finding the right resources will pave the way to personal growth and healthier relationships. Women don’t usually start off engaging in self-destructive or dis honoring behavior. Typically, something has happened, is happening, or needs to happen. When we ignore or fail to address negative patterns, the unhealthy cycles continue. These behaviors are often triggered by unhealed wounds. Facing these issues is where recovery begins. However, one must genuinely want to make positive changes and desire to turn away from unhealthy patterns. So much time and effort is devoted to fixing marriages, which is good. But the universal key is gaining wisdom and insight in understanding who you are before dating becomes an option or marriage is a go. One essential concept is discernment, which is the ability to keenly evaluate a potential partner, recognize when he is not the right one, he is not ready, or when you, are not ready! Many women who find themselves in a state of relationship chaos remain stuck for years, and some for decades. Many date with the desire for a healthy relationship that leads to marriage, but struggle to grasp what is needed before and during the process to achieve their desired results. This lack of wisdom often leads them into......

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